Pregnancy & Me | Part 2

Welcome back! Today we are diving into what the second and third trimester's were like when I was pregnant with my son who is now two years old. If you haven't had the chance to read part 1, please head over an do that first. It gives good context for what we're talking about today.

Second Trimester

Alright lets dive in! Now you may have read that morning sickness usually goes away by the second trimester and that mama gets a burst of energy. Key word being "usually". That was not the case for me. Dealing with hyperemesis gravidarium, my morning sickness stuck with me the whole pregnancy! Yeah you read that right. I had to take medication for this in order to eat and even then it was tough finding foods that didn't set me off.

Honestly having to deal with major food issues while pregnant was not surprising to me with having had a long history of dietary struggles. The benefit (if you can really call it that) of having dealt with similar issues my whole life is that I had a good foundation of dealing with my body under such struggles. The real struggle was, now I was pregnant and had to think of what was safe for both myself and my baby.

I couldn't exactly get away with just eating a cracker and a piece of cheese, with monster energy drinks like I did as a teenager. Honestly I wouldn't recommend that under any circumstances, but that's a story for another day. Maybe I'll do an Instagram Live about it one day. But for so many obvious reasons, that would not fly while being pregnant. So, I used similar methods but healthier alternatives. For example, I still had crackers, but ones that were more nutrient dense. My favourites were the Gluten Free Breton crackers that had beans, and full fat hard cheeses. Fruit was also a staple for me, because I wanted sugars so bad but also had nearly no interest in candy, and I could add fresh fruit to ice cream too so there's that. The big issue for me was that I have Celiac Disease, and all my "cravings" were things like Wendy's Spicy Chicken Sandwich, and Tim Hortons Apple Fritter doughnuts. Finding alternatives was nearly impossible, so my cravings were never satisfied. However my husband said that I got him to go out one night at 11pm for a Wendy's chocolate frosty, but I do not remember that at all! lol

One relief I found about the second trimester, was actually starting to "look pregnant". Like, here you can see why I've been feeling like crap for a while now! Ta Da! Not that I was bothered by not looking pregnant at first, but I just didn't like the questions and insinuations from people that didn't know yet. I don't know about you, but it has always been a pet peeve of mine when people always nudge at the "sure you're not pregnant" or like you wouldn't have even thought to check. Like no, I an adult female who is married and therefor sexually active, wouldn't bother to check for pregnancy when having many of the tell tale signs. Obviously. Anyways, you can see why I was relieved to now be looking pregnant.

Third Trimester

Speaking of looking pregnant, lol, I blew up! Never did I ever expect that my baby bump would get so big. But I'm also only 5' 2" so baby has literally nowhere to go but out! So I ended up with the pregnancy body that was like "is she pregnant??" from behind, "OH DANG SOOO PREGNANT!!" from the side.

So, really big baby belly, plus still having morning sickness... You've probably guessed what came of this combination already, but just in case you haven't "ArE yOu SuRe It'S nOt TwiNs??" Like no, never thought to ask. Twins just run in my family so it never occurred to me to ask that at my very first ultrasound. But maybe the techs have all just collaborated to keep me in the dark about my twin pregnancy.

Now I know that nobody means any harm when saying these things, and although they irritated me I tried to just let it be like water off a duck's back and move on. However, these things DO NOT need to be said or asked or insinuated. In the end, no matter the intent, they are disrespectful. Moving on..

I had a love hate relationship with the third trimester. Loved that I could feel my baby so much more, and dang my hair got so long and thick plus my nails were the best they've ever been, and my husband and I were getting so excited to meet our little boy. The usual irritations like having to pee constantly, having barely any clothes that fit (aside from what I stole from my husband), and struggling to put on shoes were easy enough to contend with. The "hate" side of this was mostly my medical care. This gets serious so please make sure to read the "Take Aways for New Parents" section at the end.

Unfortunately the clinic I was put in was not the type that assigns you one doctor, but instead just gets you in to see whomever is available that day. It sucked. There was no consistency of care, and no relationship able to be built between myself and my OB. Plus there was constant conflicting information. As a first time parent with no experience navigating the medical complexities of pregnancy, it was overwhelming and beyond stressful.

Before I was pregnant, my blood pressure was pretty low, 80 over 50 was my "normal". Now in the third trimester, it sat at about 130 over 90. Which the doctors said under normal circumstances was just fine, however for me they were worried about pre-eclampsia. Even though other symptoms didn't line up with that and every test they ran said I was not in danger of that. But still, it made me worry that they weren't confident in the tests (or even in their own judgement). They left me feeling like a number rather than a person every time I left their clinic, and more stressed than when I went in.

At nearly every appointment in my last month and a half (you know, when weekly appointments happen), I was sent to the hospital. Looking back now, there was absolutely no reasonable explanation for them to do that. We spent hundreds of dollars on parking, and an excessive amount of our time at the hospital and man can I tell you that wish I knew then what I know now, because all of this lead to them pressuring me into an induction. Which sad to say, I listened.

Take Aways for New Parents

Please, don't read what I've said about my experience and think "she's trying to scare me". I'm truly not. My goal is bringing awareness. Your doctors are there to serve YOU and your baby. YOU are in charge, not them. YOU know your body, they are just meeting it. YOU know what is best for your baby, they just guess.

I wish I could go back and tell myself these things at the very start of my pregnancy, and all through my prenatal care. If I had someone then who could drill that into my head, then maybe I would have been under less stress. Maybe I could have given birth naturally. Or maybe things would have turned out the exact same in the end but with my husband and I feeling a bit less railroaded by the medical system.

This is not to say that modern medicine is bad. I utilize them often, and have received beneficial care. However, sometimes there are doctors that their opinions are worth more than their patients. If you ever feel this way, please do yourself a favor and get a new doctor! Get one that values your opinion and will work with you rather than treat you like a number. If you need to, get someone you trust to remind you that you are in charge and will help you keep your goals in focus that can come with you to your appointments or even talk with them after. Get support! You and your child are worth it.